


Pomfrey's Patent Pecker-Up Potion

by undauntra



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alliteration, Bad Poetry, F/M, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-10-31
Updated: 2012-10-31
Packaged: 2017-11-17 11:15:38
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 138
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/550958
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/undauntra/pseuds/undauntra
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>An alliterative patent medicine ad.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Pomfrey's Patent Pecker-Up Potion

**Author's Note:**

> Written for an alliteration challenge long enough ago that I have forgotten the details.

Pity poor Poppy Pomfrey,  
Libidinous lady living lonely life!  
Perceive Poppy pen passionate personal:  
"Naughty nurse needs nookie."  
Prophet publishes personal.

Pity poor Peter Pettigrew,  
Voldemort's vicious vassal -- virgin!  
Perceive Peter peruse Prophet.  
Rascally rodent reads, writes response:  
"Naughty nookie-needing nurse,  
passionate paramour provides pumping!"

Picture Poppy petting Peter, Peter petting Poppy.  
Lusty Lothario lightly laves lubricious lady's labia.  
Poppy, panting, pleads: "Penetration!"  
Peter pauses, pathetic. Peter's penis? Pliable.  
Poppy prods petit pecker; Peter pulls pud. Poor Peter!  
Fellatio fails: phallus flaccid.

Poor Poppy ponders, perks! Poppy produces potion.  
"Pepper-up potion plus  
powdered peregrine pecker,  
puréed porcupine pricks,   
pickled pig's pizzle,  
parboiled primate penis,  
produces  
Pomfrey's Patent Pecker-up Potion!"  
Peter potes; Presto!   
Pecker petrified: proud penis protrudes prominently!  
Peter pounds Poppy pleasurably.

Pecker pliable?   
Lingam limp?  
Forfend flaccid phallus, friend:

Purchase Pomfrey's Patent Pecker-Up Potion!  
Sale! Sixty-six Sickles!


End file.
